July the Fifth, out on the Seventh Green,
Dawned peacefully, until Ms. Johnson brought
Her cart across the grass to play. No scream
As yet, until her friend unhapp'ly sought
An errant ball. She found it, sure, but there
Beside it was -- "Good God, is that a hand??"
It was indeed. But whose? The girls did stare
In shock, regretting their most recent stand
Against on-course libations. When at last
A course employee stopped with them, as one
They screamed and pointed. "Oh!" he said. "That's great!
"Un-handy Andy earned his name. Yeah, fun!"
"What do you mean?" "Oh, see, just after eight
Last night, he ran the fireworks, and he blew--"
"Oh God, don't tell us. Let's all just play through."
-Inspired by Andy Van Tol